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Do you know 'Hwang young Jo', 'Lee Bong Joo'? Yes. They are Korean marathon players. Have you ever experienced a marathon? Until this year, I had never thought that I would have a chance to marathon. But in April, one of my friends recommended that I should take part in marathon competition. She said that the competition was hosted by the sport brand 'NIKE' and the accessory brand 'Jestina'. Up to 7000 people could apply and Just a woman whose age is 20s was qualified. I hesitated at first because I don't like running too much. But as my friend said, I thought it could be a good experience and when I become older than now, it would be more difficult to try it. So I decided to be brave. I applied for that competition.
And in May 26, the marathons competition was held in Sang-Am World Cup Ground. When I arrived there, there were a lot of participants. Before the race, at the starting point, entertainers 'Haha', 'No Hong Chul' came here to cheer up the participants. They made players laugh by dancing and saying funny things. And then, the competition began. There were too many players and the road was quite narrow so I couldn't run well at first. So many participants including me just walked fast. The route was connected to the 'Haneul Park' out of Sang Am World Cup Ground. And the destination was the same place as one where we started. So it was total 7km. In the middle of the competition, the gap between participants was getting bigger. And I was becoming out of breath. Besides, my right ankle was little big painful. But in front of me a lot of woman participants were running so I thought I cannot give up here. And finally I arrived at destination in 59minutes. Hand some guys welcomed us at the destination giving us cool water. And as a souvenir, I received a necklace, collaboration piece by 'Nike' and 'Jestina'. Even though it was hard, it was really exciting and it will be unforgettable memory. I thought I could not do this. Because I thought it is really difficult to run 7km in a certain time. But I made it. So I realized before we try something, we don't have to worry if we make mistake or fail. Trying itself is important. In the future, whenever I try a new thing, I will not worry first. I will be brave as I was.
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Sunday, December 30, 2012
yejeepark
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Trying something first before being afraid of it, is really important in our lives like you wrote.
ReplyDeleteI got your point after i read your writing.
It would be much better if you write how you felt more vividly while running the marothon.
And how the marothon affected your life afterwards.
200702094 Chong rim Yoo
ReplyDeleteWhat nice experience! I liked how you startes your introduction with a question. I could guess what your topic will be:) It what have been more exciting it you write the feelings more dynamically while you were running. The feelings that you wrote are to general. Good luck with your 2nd draft:)
To yejeepark
ReplyDeleteFrom Kwang-Jin Lee
Assignment 1st draft
1. What I liked about this writing is this writing was about a positive and challenging experience. Because when I thought about my past, I used to think about bad things like accidents. It was really great to read about some achievement you made.
2. Your main point seems to be a experience taking part in a marathon competition. And you want to say that don't worry about something you haven't tried yet.
3. The line "I thought I cannot give up here." was quite powerful to me. Because I think it reveals your hard will during the race.
4. I think using 'things' should be used at the least, and there is a sentence where Haha and Hong-chul No comes out. You wrote that they "said funny things", and I think 'funny things' could be quite unclear. Maybe 'funny jokes(?)' could be better.
5. I think your writing is really great but quite unlively. You can use some dialogues(direct quotations of a person's exact words) as we learned in class. It can make some vividness, I think.
ReplyDeleteDo you know ‘Hwang young Jo’, ‘Lee Bong Joo’? Of course you do. They are Korean marathon players. Have you ever experienced a marathon? Until this year, I had never thought that I would have a chance to marathon. But one day in April, one of my friends called me and said, “YeJee, I have something to tell you. You are taking part in the marathon competition.”
She said that the competition was hosted by a famous sport brand and an accessory brand, and up to 7000 people could apply and just a woman whose age is 20s could apply for it.
At first, I didn’t believe what she said. I thought it was a joke. But it was true. She secretly applied for the marathon race. The reason she did this was that she wanted that I could have more experience and by having this experience, I could increase patience.
I hesitated because I don’t like running too much. But as my friend said, I thought it could be a good experience in my life and I could learn how to be more patient through this chance. So I decided to run in the race.
It was in May 26 when the marathons competition was held in Sang-Am World Cup Ground.
When I arrived there, there were a lot of participants. Before the race, at the starting point, entertainers ‘Haha’, ‘No Hong Chul’ came here to cheer up the participants. They made players laugh by dancing and saying funny jokes. And then, the competition began. There were too many players and the road was quite narrow so I couldn’t run well at first. So many participants including me just walked fast. The route led to the ‘Han-eul Park’ out of Sang Am World Cup Ground. And the destination was the same place as one where we started. So it was total 7km. In the middle of the competition, more many participants started to run faster. So the gap between participants was getting bigger. I didn’t want to be behind others so I tried to keep the pace with others as far as I could. But the road was so dust-blowing that I had to run covering the mouth with my hand. Or, there was also a hill. I was becoming out of breath. Besides, my right ankle was a little bit painful when I run faster.
But in front of me a lot of woman participants were running so I thought I could not give up here.
And I thought “even some women who look weaker than me are running hard, so if I give up here, I will regret forever.” So, I repeated running and walking fast. Soon, I could hear a staff saying, “Cheer up, you guys almost arrived. Run! Run!” I felt excited when he said that. So I run faster and faster.
And finally I arrived at destination in 59minutes. What a relief! Hand some guys were standing in a row and welcomed us at the destination giving us cool water. And as a present for finishing the race, I received a necklace, the collaboration piece by the two brands I mentioned. Even though it was hard, it was really exciting and I though it would be unforgettable memory. I thought I could not do this. Because I thought it is really difficult to run 7km in a certain time. But I made it. So I realized before we try something, we don’t have to worry if we make mistake or fail. Trying itself is important. In the future, whenever I try a new thing, I will not worry first. I will be brave as I was.